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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28487610">Fleeting memory</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/lshrewind/pseuds/lshrewind'>lshrewind</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>NCT (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Break Up, Heartbreak, I'm Sorry, M/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 16:20:48</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,005</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28487610</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/lshrewind/pseuds/lshrewind</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Anagapesis; loss of feelings for someone who was formerly loved; falling out of love</p><p>Love drags you in, it holds you tight; then you start undeniably falling. So what happens when love lets you go when it loosens its grip do you fall once more? Are you greeted by the feeling of loneliness or in the true spirit of loneliness are you simply left by yourself.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Jung Sungchan/Osaki Shotaro</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>17</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Fleeting memory</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The rain is coming down and the soft pitter-patter on the roof of the cab Shotaro was in takes him to another world. A world where he lives every moment without regret and life simply feels like a fresh spring day. That bliss doesn't last long as he’s brought back to reality with the sound of his phone ringing. He takes his phone out of his pocket and reads the ID. ‘Sungchanie’ scoffs at the sweet nickname, something he should have changed long ago. To be honest, Shotoaro didn't know why he hasn't changed it yet the feelings he once harbored for the older were now a distant memory. Shotaro moves his pointer finger over to the pickup button and answers.</p><p>A familiar voice Shotaro identifies as Sungchan asks, “Where are you?”</p><p>“Where are you?” Shotaro asks back.</p><p>“I’m home,” The younger replied.</p><p>“I’m in a cab” He simply replies.</p><p>He hears a huff from the other line.</p><p>Sungchan speaks after a moment, “Are you almost home?”</p><p>“Oh, I’m sorry,” Shotaro replies in a quiet voice.</p><p>A voice full of questions fills his ears, “For what?”</p><p>“Just, everything,” He says voice staggering.</p><p>“Come home,” Sungchan says with a pleading voice</p><p>Shotaro explains, “I left my wallet there.”</p><p>“Oh-” Sungchan starts.</p><p>“Hey” And Shotaro interrupts.</p><p>Sungchan pipes down, “Never mind”</p><p>“No, what is it?” Shotaro asked.</p><p>“I don’t think we’re in love anymore,” Sungchan stated with a sharp breath.</p><p>Shotaro simply replies, “Oh ok.”</p><p>And then the line goes dead. Maybe Shotaro should have seen this coming and to be fair he knew it was bound to happen sooner or later, just not now. He puts his phone down in his lap and sits in silence for the rest of the ride.<br/>
By the time Shotaro gets back to his apartment, it had not fully hit him that his boyfriend of two years just broke up with him. He took his shoes off and placed them by the door slowly making his way to his bedroom. Not feeling motivated to change he goes to lay on his bed. As he is about to sit down he takes notice of a letter and a silver bracelet with the letters S&amp;S engraved on the attached charm. It’s the matching bracelet he and Sungchan shared- had shared. He picks the letter up and opens it. It was handwritten on light pink paper and it was addressed to him. So with the utmost care, Shotaro took a breath cleared his throat, and started to read.</p><p>Dear Shotaro,<br/>
You were once a world that I entered and never regretted to have ever done that; a world of majestic and beauty of which I never shame of having myself in it.<br/>
It was enchanting when we fell in love with each other. Days were years that we counted and every moonshine was countless sleepless nights we had talked and mingled and enjoyed with each other with different topics about almost everything, or just about us. We yearned on each other's details, dumbfounded, and in every detail was a canvass made to explain one another's thoughts and emotions.</p><p>We thought we could make it; I always thought that one day you'll be the one whom I wait to walk along with his arm around his father, escorting him throughout a red carpet doused with flower petals while the choir sings their songs – and while I wait at the of the aisle.</p><p>I was wrong; too much imagination for me, I guess. Though I was never wrong to choose you, to love you, to build something with you, to have a life with you, and a life full of love with the ideas of you and most especially you. I was wrong of my expectations, of good endings I’ve read in fairy-tale books when I was a kid, and I had it so high that it made me crumbled up as I fell swiftly into the ground with the most terrifying impact, breaking the glasses, shattering the ground I feel into, and finally having the hard to pick up all the pieces for the fear of hurting myself even more.</p><p>But I am sorry for all the promises I gave, I said, but keep all the gifts – the physical gifts and the gift of learning, the lessons I may have taught these past times. All those plans are wasted time discussing how or when we’ll do our goals, our hopes, one day, but sadly that day would never come for me.</p><p>And please don't worry about my plans, those I had told you because I'll do them myself; I'll complete the tasks and wishes myself and for myself, because I can't bear to have them accomplished for someone else, the ones I’m going to love in the future deserves much better; because I can only do them with you — even though you're not mine anymore.</p><p>, Sungchan </p><p>Shotaro blinked once then twice then said two himself, “So this is how it ends, this is what it’s like when the prince doesn't get the princess in the end.”</p><p>He looked at the bracelet on his wrist then at the bracelet on the bed. Shotaro and Sungchan had gotten them together. Neither took them off, even when they were fighting, even when the end seemed undeniable, they were a piece of hope. Now the end had arrived, there was no longer that hope, all they had left were the memories. Whether that was good or bad thing they would stay and occupy his mind until it was time for him to let them go and move on</p><p>Once upon a time, they were in love.</p><p>And before that, they had been falling.</p><p>Falling in love, falling into each other.</p><p>Then they fell again.</p><p>Only this time they fell out of love.</p><p>Now they said goodbye before but this time it was a goodbye that would last forever.</p><p>"I loved you," Shotaro said to himself. "Once you were all I needed now your just a fleeting memory."</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This is my first fanfic so I hope you liked it and wasn't poorly written.<br/>Also, I'm so sorry this is so sad I wrote this at like 3 am after I thought my boyfriend was going to break up with me.</p><p>(The speaking part is from IU's Can't Love You Anymore)</p></blockquote></div></div>
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